Chicago

This past weekend was absolutely everything that I needed in my life right now. It was so great to get away from everything for a few days of fun. I left work after lunch on Thursday and jumped on MARC for my flight out of BWI. I got to the airport more than two hours early, so I sat in the terminal on the phone with anyone that would entertain me. Thankfully, our plane was boarded early so I didn't have quite as long to sit.

A short two hour flight later and we were preparing to land. I found my way out of Midway to the train. After a moment of looking like a lost and confused tourist, I figured out the transit system and jumped on the appropriate train into the city. I called the hotel before our plane took off, so I knew exactly which stop at which to exit.

I got off at Grand and wandered around for a couple blocks, until I found a street map. Somehow I had managed to come out of the train and head in exactly the right direction. I found the hotel (Holiday Inn Chicago City Center for those interested) and went up to the room. At this point I was starving, so I decided to head out and find something to eat. I ended up on the Magnificent Mile and found something quick to take back to the room. After all, the OC was coming on and I had to see it. (Quick side note: this season has been very disappointing so far. Too much of it has been completely predictable. Not that I ask for a lot of high drama and suspense from the OC, but I don't expect this!!!).

Nick called once OC ended and said he was on his way home and that I should be ready to go out to Boys Town when he got to the hotel. I jumped in the shower and picked out my 'cute little outfit' (shout-out to L.I. Nik) and was ALMOST ready when Nick got home. Rome wasn't built in a day, nor were my stunning good looks. Hehehe. Nick got ready and called his college friend Dan to see if he would be joining us. Dan of course pussied out, saying blah blah it is already 9 and I have to work tomorrow, blah blah.

Since Dan wasn't joining us, Nick got online and found a couple bars for us to check out. We jumped in a cab and headed off for Boys Town. The first bar we stopped in was Cocktails. The reason I wanted to go was the sign promising $9 pitchers of vodka drinks. Excuse me. You obviously have never met the DC Mean Girls and do not understand how we love cheap vodka. When we got inside, we were treated with a very special bonus surprise. Gogo dancers.

I am never one to shy away from a naked or nearly naked man. However, strip clubs and the like make me a little bit uncomfortable. I feel dirty for watching them, even though I know that is what they are there for. The big dilemma is that I can't do all the filthy things to them that I want to do. Basically I see it as one big long cock tease without even being able to bring yourself off at the end. Regardless, we decided to stay for one pitcher.

The bar itself was tiny, no bigger than DIK Bar, and the stage was actually just a raised box in the back of the bar. The dancer on stage when we arrived was some Latin man. Not bad looking, but didn't get my blood boiling. Nick and I settled into our first drinks and sat back to watch the entertainment unfold. Little did we know what we were about to experience.

The next dancer up looked so much like a celebrity, but I couldn't figure out who. He was dirty blonde with hair to his shoulders, nice body, and slightly busted face. Then it hit me. He was a Poor Man's Kevin Sorbo, of TV's Conan the Barbarian. PMKS started his routine and Nick and I had to fight from laughing out loud. It was exactly that, a routine. He was doing Jazzercise on stage. And in between combos, smacking guys in the face with his cock. Lovely. As we looked around the room, we noticed more than one group of people laughing at his performance.

Once that pitcher was gone, we went across the street to Roscoe's. This place was similar to JR's in feel, only it was larger with a dance room in the back. It was there that they had a wet underwear contest. Nick and I hung around for a while, but by the time the show started, we couldn't see because so many people were crowded around the stage. Are the boys in Chicago that starved for dick??? I do not know. At some point in the evening though, we did see Shane, one of the gay guys from "Road Rules" and "Real World/Road Rules Challenge" 'fame'. He is still really cute, but has definitely gained weight.

We headed out of Roscoe's after a couple drinks, including a long island for me. Since I haven't drank at all in the last two months, I had to get my body ready for a full weekend of drinking. The next bar we went to was beside Cocktails, a bar called Sidetracks. This was a beautiful bar. It was the size or two JR's, maybe bigger, but newly renovated and completely modern looking. I really liked the space itself, but they were playing nothing but comedy clips. I love a good comedy bit, but a full night of them in a crowded bar is just more than I can handle. We didn't even stay long enough to get a drink there.

Back outside, we hailed a cab and headed back to our hotel. Nick still had a full day of work the next day and I had a full day of sight-seeing planned. Come Friday morning I woke up with the strangest sensation. My mouth was dry, my head was throbbing and I couldn't bring myself to open my eyes. Oh, hangover old friend, how I have missed thee.

I stayed in bed way longer than I should have, while Nick finished his work for the day. That afternoon we hit the streets hard. We walked north down the Magnificent Mile towards the Lake. We got the Hancock Building and decided to head up to the observation deck for a view of the city. Wow. It is incredibly beautiful from up there. It seems like you can see for miles in each direction. I was amazed at how big the Lake is. Sure, I have seen maps of it and all, but until you see it in person, it is hard to picture how big it truly is.

We had a late lunch/early dinner downstairs in the Cheesecake Factory. I know, here we are in Chicago and we went to Cheesecake Factory. But, by this point neither of us had eaten anything all day and we were starving. It is good we ate there though because otherwise we wouldn't have met Demetris "Dee" Hawkins.

A group of four women was sat at the table across from us and Nick and I immediately started staring. First, one of the women was dressed head to toe in pink. No lie, from her shoes to her lipstick she was a vision of pink. The other women each had on some colorful numbers, but none could compare to my aunt's blonde hair piece in the back. The women all ordered this big pink drinks and we couldn't help but ask what they were drinking. This opened the door for a little friendly cross-table conversation. It was then that Dee thrusted her card on us, so that we could get all of her information in case we wanted any Mary Kay. Of course. I suppose we would have figured it out if we had watched them get out of the pink Cadillac that must have been parked near by.

After eating like the starved fat girls we are, Nick and I hit the streets again. This time we were off to the Levi's store to try on the Offender jeans. The store didn't have any to try, and we were more than disappointed. From there we went to the Virgin Megastore. Nick's friend Tyler called us while we were in the store. He met us at the store and then we headed off to Boys Town to find some of the new 2(x)ist Flash underwear.

Poor Tyler. Nothing says fun for a straight man like underwear shopping with two gay men. We ended up at the Universal Gear out there and found the underwear, but of course they were all out of our sizes! Damn you Chicago gays!!! After what was surely an eternity to Tyler, we arranged to meet up with the rest of Nick's friends from college.

I was then introduced to all of Nick's closest friends from college, Sam, Dan, Lisa and Shannon. I pulled my usual introspective quiet act while they all caught up. After everyone ate, the group headed back to Lisa's while we went back to the hotel to get ready for the night. We met back up at Duffy's for a couple beers. Duffy's was a decent sports bar, with some really good music playing. I was so tempted to head to the back and start dancing, but I knew we were leaving soon.

We left Duffy's and headed over to "The Apartment", another bar/club. True to its name, the bar is designed to look like you are in someone's apartment. There is a tub with a shower curtain that is actually a beer tub. There are lots of couches in one corner that is made to look like a den. There was even a bedroom that I assume is for VIPs. Why it wasn't opened for us, I'll never know.

Once we got in there, I was suddenly a man on a mission. That was mission was one of extreme drunkenness. I think I had two beers in my hands at all times that entire night. Funny thing was that I never got wasted. I was definitely buzzed, but never out of control. I'm sure Nick was quite thankful for that! We stayed at Apartment, drinking and dancing, until all the lights came on. I don't think I talked to anyone once we got in there because I was too busy dancing with Lisa and her roommate. It is nights like that that I remember why I used to have so much fun being with my straight friends all the time.

As we left the bar, Nick and I parted ways with the rest of the group, in hopes of finding a bar still open in Boys Town. Nothing was open, and after a near trip to Pegasus in Greek town, we headed back to the hotel. The next morning Nick headed off to his college fair and I slept in. God I love being on vacation. I finally did wake up though and got my shit together. I had a lot of the city I still wanted to see, before we headed out of Chicago that afternoon. I walked around much of the city that morning and saw a majority of the sites in the city. I have to say that I really love the city of Chicago. If it weren't for those horrendous winters, I could easily see myself living there.

By 1:30, I decided to head back to the center of the city. I ended my day at Navy Pier, taking in all the sites. Especially the young sailors in white. Sea men. Yum. Hehe. Anyway, I met up with Nick for the end of the college fair and helped him take everything to the car. We headed back to the hotel to get our bags and then it was off to West Lafayette for the Purdue-Notre Dame football game that night. More on that and the rest of the weekend to come!